The inexorable stream of digitally-supplied poontang that has fueled Rich’s dating life for the past year was ultimately what convinced me to give online personals a try. I think that I probably embarked upon this mission somewhat prematurely. I don’t feel that I’m entirely ready to go through the ordeal of first-dates, denied kisses, and inflated restaurant bills, but I guess that I’ve got to do it some time. And while online dating may not be the way to meet the ideal woman, it sure is the right way to meet the freaks.
The Ordeal Continues…
Those of you that read my Christmas travel article know that I had no luck at making it to Cincinnati to see my family. After several egregiously rude interactions with Continental Airlines (rude on their part, that is!), I decided to dispute the charges on my credit card. About four months later this story continues.
Brotherhood of Journalism
For a few months now I’ve been posting this banal drivel as a means of attempting to entertain. Only recently has the possibility emerged for my half-witted attempts at humor to be protected by the United States Government. It may still be a long shot, but some day you weary web surfers will gaze upon the pearly words of a professional writer. On that day, I will be called a journalist.
Digital Freedom in the New Millenium
After a considerable amount of investigation into a new technology that Intel is integrating into its microprocessors (codenamed LaGrande) I developed a healthy skepticism of the future it promised. This hardware is designed to enable an operating system that supports a new standard of security, euphemistically called trusted computing (TC). The beneficiaries of this improved security will not be the end-user as much as the creators of digital media. And, of course Microsoft.
Pope John Paul II Versus Jason Voorhees
I’ve been doing some thinking lately. No, I’m not talking about the kind of thinking that benefits mankind, generates huge revenues, or even moves the masses to better themselves and humanity. I’m talking about the type of thinking that could get me in trouble with the religious right. Specifically, the recent news about the Pope has made me think about what kind of an unkillable Energizer Bunny that dude is. In that spirit, I wanted to compare and contrast the relative abilities of Pope Jon Paul II and Jason Voorhees in my own battle royale of skillz.
Phase 2: Filling Out the Skeleton
After wranging with management, coordinating with friends, and generally chewing my fingernails to the quick I’ve finally resolved the outstanding issues that were preventing me from getting this sabbatical planning going. I now have a skeleton in place as to what I’m going to do and where I’m going to do it. Over the coming month(s), I plan on filling this out where question exist.
| Dates | Location | Company |
|---|---|---|
| 7/30-8/6 | Turkey | Will, Tiffany |
| 8/6-9/1 | Greece Czech Republic, Luxembourg, Austria, Belgium | None! |
| 9/1-9/9 | Switzerland | Matt, Hilary |
| 9/10-9/24 | Holland, France, Germany | Rich |
I may have some company for part of that five-week block in the middle of the trip. However, I’m hoping to leave at least a couple of one- or two-week blocks in unplanned. That gives me the option to travel spontaneously. Cities that I might see during that time include the European Capitals of Culture.
Bad Movies Come In All Colors
For hundreds of years white Europeans perpetrated a crime against humanity with their treatment of Africans. They (the Africans) were ripped from the arms of their families, brutally shipped across the Atlantic in conditions inferior to the cattle trade, and sold into a life of constant labor and abuse. Now, white America, this blight upon our history is revisiting us in the form of terrible movies that generate inconceivable profits. That’s right, bitches, it’s payback.
Scott Versus the Washing Machine
I have washed many a load of laundy in my day. I used to be suspicously familiar with the driers next to my freshman dorm. But I’ll leave that story to Matt on his own weblog. I’m off tangent now, though. What I want to say is that this whole clothes washing thing has gotten ridiculously complicated. With Krisztina here I totally took for granted that my clothes would just show up clean in my closet every couple of weeks. Now I’m fighting The Man and His System every week just to avoid looking homeless.
The Movie Rating System
The world needs an objective person to devise a good movie rating system. I am that person and this is your system. Anybody with the intelligence God gave a salamander and the income that God gave a McDonald’s employee has Netflix account. Since the cost of a movie on Netflix is effectively only a time investment I see a continuum of movie quality from a $10 theater ticket to a cost-free 1.5 hour commitment on the most boring of days. Given this sliding scale, here is how movies should be rated.
Gogglepow!
I love Google. Google has ushered in a new era for the internet. The time has long past since we’ve been unable to find relevant content for our burning questions. But now, thanks to Google, I can find copious amounts of absolute bullshit in a matter of milliseconds. And, best yet, with the Google picture search, I can uncover some of the strangest and least expected sights that one could have expected. Let me show you what I mean.